Clean Your Closets...Clean Your Life

I spent far too many hours the other day cleaning out my closets. It was worth it, though. I started in the kitchen pantry, throwing out expired food and mismatched plastic containers. I reorganized the shelves and made more sense of the whole closet. It took over six hours, not because the pantry is quite large, but because I also organized all the clutter within 20 feet of the pantry, too. You can guess there was a lot of clutter that had accumulated in my kitchen. 

I kept telling myself that I needed to do it to make sense of my life. I needed order and more empty space around me. My husband had said that he was starting to feel like the walls were caving in, and I noticed that I felt that way, too. I needed breathing room, and a sense of order.

A place for everything, and everything in its place, I kept telling myself.

After finishing the pantry area, I moved on to my bedroom closet. Working from one corner to the other, I hung up my clothes according to color, and completely cleared my closet floor.

More breathing room, and a sense of order.

The whole effort took most of the day. What a waste of the day, I silently told myself as I got ready for bed. I thought of all the fun things I could have been doing instead. Was it worth it?

As I settled into bed, drawing the day to a close, a sweet feeling started to simmer inside me. It reminded me of a subtle hum in the distant like the Whos in Who-ville after the Grinch stole all their Christmas presents, and started to grow into a warm, glowing flame of happiness. I felt a lovely sense of calm and joy seemed to ooze to the surface, something that I hadn't felt in a long time.

Cleaning my closets opened the access door to my stored happiness. I forgot how it works that way...always. 

I am actually looking forward to cleaning my basement, next. It's a really big mess, which means even more joy for me, right? I am looking forward to finding out!

You are worth $1,000,000!

Guess what?

Your unique skills have been analyzed and our planet has determined, accepted, and is excited about you!

The value of your worth is a guaranteed $1,000,000.

You have received the green light to take the most direct route towards the $1,000,000, utilizing your skills and ideas.

Question--What would you do and how would you do it?

Circuit Cleaning

Do you get overwhelmed by cleaning? Are you burned out from housework?

I sure am. I have been a stay-at-home mom for over a decade and I can’t stand cleaning. It’s funny that I say that because I used to find it very satisfying to have a clean house, but over the years keeping up with it has become very draining. With kids in the house, I like to say that cleaning house is like “shoveling during a snowstorm”. 

Recently I’ve tried an approach that seems to be working. I call it Circuit Cleaning. Just like circuit exercising, where you go from one station to the next, circuit cleaning keeps you moving along the areas of the house that need to be addressed. 

Here’s how it works: 

1. Pick a spot (...any spot) in your house and devote only 5 minutes to tidying it up.

1. After 5 minutes, move on another spot (preferably far from where you just were), and tidy up for another 5 minutes.
2. Do this for another cycle or so, and then just sit and relax for 5 minutes.
3. Keep up this pattern for one hour. You won’t believe how much you actually get done.

Let me know how this works for you! Also I love suggestions, so please share them with me.

How tiny baby steps are creating a new me!

For years I have been trying to get back into running. After beating cancer, giving birth to four children, RAISING four children, getting divorced, and getting remarried, I found that I didn't make enough time to exercise. I now find that I know the true meaning of the phrase "use it or lose it". UGH!

Over the last few years I have been slowly easing moderate exercise into my (almost) daily routine. I have been trying to lose my baby weight and slow down the aging process. The results have been a bit frustrating.

A few weeks ago, I decided to push myself a little harder and see what happens.

I started running.

Sounds impressive, huh? It's nice to be a runner again.

My secret is that I can only run a minute or so at a time. I decided that in order to stick with it and actually enjoy it, I need to ease into it slowly. So it started with baby steps.

I got on the treadmill on day one with no expectations other than do the best that I could. I focused on visualizing myself effortlessly floating across the tread, basking in the idea that a runner's high was on the horizon. I paid attention to my form, making sure that my joints moved smoothly and efficiently together, almost like a mannequin doll. I was able to stay in that state about 30 seconds before my energy started to cave in on me.

Taking it back to a walk, I relaxed for a few minutes, and then tried it again. This time I was a bit more warmed up, so my run lasted a tad longer and felt a tad better. I repeated this about 3 more times, and then called it quits. Enough for day one, I happily declared.

The next day, I tried it again. With no pressure other than trying my best and improving my progress, I ran/walked. I added more visualizing such as imagining the extra fat I was carrying was just burning up. This created even more incentive to push a little harder and farther.

After two weeks of this, I got on the scale and found I lost 4 pounds! This was so amazing because my diet had stayed the same (I always eat super healthy food).

It's been about five weeks since I started this baby step routine and I have noticed a few more things:

     1. I think I have created a new habit because I actually look forward to my daily run/walk.
     2. As I continue to add more visualization and affirmation work while exercising ("my cells are buzzing with energy," "my fat is burning up," "running is easy for me,") I find that my progress is improving nicely. I have fun seeing if I can run just a little bit farther than I did the day before.
     3. Somedays I just walk. No problem. I feel good about being consistent.
     4. I find that I am able to add variety to my routine. Last week I went on a trail in the woods down the street from my house. Yesterday, I walked with a friend and caught up on her news.
     5. Sometimes the effort lasts 5 minutes, sometimes an hour. When I feel like I've reached my limit, I stop. No problem.
     6. I am starting to add some other types of exercise in, too. Last week my husband and I went to the beach and did laps to and from the floating dock. (He did many more than I did, but that was just fine. We both truly enjoyed it.) I have started baby stepping with weights in our basement gym. I also LOVE to take a bit of time and lay on my yoga mat and just stretch--like a cat. This week I am getting my bike out of the shed.
     7. I don't have a set time when I do it everyday. I just fit it in sometime.
     8. I am starting to wonder what other baby steps I can take in my life!

It all seems a bit exciting to me as it doesn't add stress or great pain to my life. Of course, I am committed to keeping it going in my life--a very important part of my progress. I also have people around me who support and celebrate with me.

I am sharing this with you to possibly inspire you to start your own baby steps. What would they look like?

I would love to hear your story! I am always looking for inspiration myself. Thanks for listening....

Love, Kathleen

Inner Happiness

For the last few years, the concept of "inner happiness" has been a constant curiosity of mine. When I first heard of the term, I didn't understand what it meant. I thought it seemed like it applied only to a small, special group of people, but as I learned more about it, I realized that it was possible, and even appropriate, for me to integrate it into my life.

Fast forward to today, and I know it is a key component to all aspects of my life. When an area of my life is weak and I am struggling with it, instead of looking outward and blaming an external force for my tension, I have learned to look inward, and ask myself "what can I do to shift my energy and mood today, regardless of the discomfort."

Today I am bothered by something. A series of events with someone in my life has gone awry, and it is frustrating me. In turn, that frustration is dampening my otherwise joyful and grateful mood.

The events have been scattered over the last few weeks, so my decline in mood was subtle--I didn't even notice it much until it crossed a threshold where I felt teary and melancholy for no apparent reason.

Since I have very little control over the actual situations that stimulated my low mood, I have no choice but to look within and find how I can build up a new reserve of good feelings despite it all.

Is this possible? That question has led me to a special action item today. First, take 45 minutes to sit on my sun porch (in the sun), and start writing. Monitor if and how my mood changes. Knowing that rest and sun usually make me feel pretty good, chances are my mood may be elevated a bit.

(45 minutes later)

Wow! Sitting for 45 minutes worked well for me. As I rested and soaked up the winter sun, clarity started coming upon me. I was able to see the issue I had been struggling with from a different angle, and a new answer was revealed. It was enough to make me excited again--giving me a sense of hope.

As a bonus, I went forward with my day and received some terrific news about a business opportunity I had been working on. 

Over the years of studying and practice the art of attaining "inner peace", the most important thing I have learned is to trust it. It's always there when you need it.

Happy With, Happy Without

It really would be a treat to be happy everyday. Often, though, life's stresses can chip away at that. 

One way to combat those stresses is to ask yourself "can I allow myself to be happy even though life is not perfectly pleasant today?" 

By asking that question, it reveals that you really do have a choice of how you are currently feeling. The trick is to then ask yourself what is getting in the way of you feeling bad?

The other day I felt like I was having a bad morning. I hadn't gotten much sleep the night before, my husband and I had had a rough time communicating the day before, and it was a dark and stormy Friday the 13th. 

Two of my teenagers asked for my help that morning. Groggily, I got my other two kids off to school (late) and drove my college-aged daughter thirty minutes to a friend's house, in slush and freezing rain. I then came home and prepared the soup of the day for our local market. Time ran out, so I left a mess in the kitchen while packing up for my 16-year-old daughter's driver's test. While cleaning out her car (those kids can be so messy), I bumped into the corner of the car door and gouged my forehead.  Afer walking straight to the freezer for a cold pack and bandage, I called my daughter at school because I couldn't find the keys to her car. (Really??) 

Feeling like stress was pushing me to the brink, I allowed a few tears to be released to counteract the overwhelming feelings. (Crying doesn't happen much, but it's always a good tactic for me to let it flow if I do feel them welling up.) 

I then starting asking myself what I would need to do to be "happy without"--happy without order, pain-free, and sunshine. 

My answer started with silence and presence. I took note that as I stood in the kitchen while my daughter frantically searched for her car keys, nothing bad was actually happening to me at that moment. I let my daughter handle the task of determining which car to take to her driver's test. If she was old enough to drive, wasn't she old enough to solve this problem on her own?

And so she did. She gave up on finding the keys (no where to be found) and called a friend who had offered her car for use.  Off we went to the school parking lot to get the car. 

My stress level had stabilized. Not getting better, but not getting worse, despite driving to the next town in terrible winter weather in a compact car. (I drive a Suburban and feel very safe it in--perfect for hauling lots of kids and stuff around. Small cars make me nervous. Here I was in the passenger's seat with my daughter driving a tiny car with no 4-wheel drive on an icy Maine winter day.  Yikes!)

"Happy with, happy without."

We made it to town with only a few nervous gasps from me. My daughter pleaded with me to remain calm as she was obviously feeling very stressed out. I remain silent and as peaceful as I could be. We circled around town to practice a final parallel parking mission, also got in a car wreck by her fault, and I found out that she did not have her permit because her wallet had been stolen two weeks prior. 

"Happy with, happy without."

Thankfully, I was able to stay at a stable stress level, and even start to diminished it once she was registered and in the care of of the driver's license administrators. "You can do it", I offered with a smile.

While she was out on the road, I started utilizing all the coping strategies that I had acquired and practiced in the past.  "This too shall pass" was a big one. Tomorrow, heck even tonight, the sun may come out, my daughter might have her license in hand, my husband and I might have some quiet time to recover nicely (we always do) as the kids will be with their dad, and I could have a good workout to fight my fatigue. I was feeling better already.

"Happy with, happy without."

Things always work out the way they are supposed to. My stress level that day quickly diminished. Even though my daughter did not pass her driving test, she came in first place at her track meet later that evening. My husband and I had a glorious weekend, and the sun has come out.

The neat thing about that Friday the 13th is that it is a clear example of how transient life's stresses really are. A great way to keep them in perspective and under control is to remind yourself to be "happy with, happy without". Give it a try!